Normal afternoon doze….sometimes I wake that jolt you can get from a short nap, when a certain thought just appears, it can be quite alarming.
Today was a beautiful day, blue sky, with enough cloud to keep it interesting, big fluffy things at low level that you could watch scoot along on the breeze, but just a shade too fast to watch their shapes mould and morph and warp.
The thought I had was a realisation of sorts, that someone I’d last seen, who I’d actually last been in the company of, not as in talking on the phone, or by email, or Facebook, but there in front of me, I’d last seen them in May 1996 at a bus stop in Manchester. And I was off on my travels, years of them, and they weren’t. And you think you’ll stay in touch, and you don’t. But you catch up sporadically here and there, but you’re moving on, there’s no rhyme or reason really to meet, different lives, cities, circles, nothing in common any more.
And what I realised was not only was that the last time I saw them, it will also be the last time I ever see them. Unless by some freak chance, it’s not going to happen.
And suddenly everything from that time is all as cold and distant and past as it should be after 20 or so years.